Wednesday, December 5, 2007

"What Can You Do for Me, Baby?"

The famous pig and malanga farmer from Cabaiguán, who came to the U.S. with the expressed purpose of delivering his daughter to Castro, will instead be residing with his family here until 2010 or 2012, when, supposedly, he intends to return with his prize to the fatherland. In the meantime, he needs a job, his stipend from the G-2 apparently not being sufficient to support the lifestyle to which he has become accustomed. Although both pigs and malangas are a lot more common here than in Cuba, Rafael Izquierdo is afraid that he may not find suitable employment in his chosen line of work (chosen from a list of noble proletarian jobs which he likewise never held). I am sure that some generous pig farmer in Florida will allow him to wallow with his pigs if he grows tired of his handlers. It appears, however, that Izquierdo would prefer to do electrical work here. The poor man is unaware that, unlike in Cuba, there are independent unions in this country. Joe Cubas has generously offered to assist him and his family (there have been private discussions about that) but Izquierdo says that he prefers to work. It will certainly be a new experience for him as his neighbors from Cabaiguán never knew exactly what he did for a living but don't remember him with any special essence de porcine. America presents other opportunities for him: he could, for example, increase his stable of common-law wives.

Whatever happens on Rafael Izquierdo's road to assimilation at least his daughter will be safe for the next two and one-half years. As expected, Circuit Judge Jeri B. Cohen approved the out of court settlement between Cubas and Izquierdo which granted the latter custody and gave him a generous grace period in which to decide whether he wishes to raise his daughter in slavery or freedom.

The trial ended with Cubas and Izquierdo shaking hands and hugging. Maybe Cubas can adopt Izquierdo.


Vana said...

Lol Manuel you are so witty!

Hopefully he will find a job and be happy here, so he does not return his daughter to hell.

Anonymous said...

Dude, why are you so mean. your tone is really uncalled for , you're a big **.

Manuel A.Tellechea said...


Dude, one question: what profanity has just two letters?