Friday, May 11, 2007

Cuba's Al Gore: Fidel Castro Díaz-Balart


What fame, if any, Fidel Castro Diaz-Balart has acquired in his nearly 60 years by being something other than his father's son, is confined to a footnote or two in some obscure science journal, where he is identified as a "nuclear scientist." That was definitely the thing to be 40 years ago. Nuclear scientists were considered the smartest people. They represented the future and that future wasn't in plastics. It was nuclear energy that would liberate mankind from the "slavery" of fossil fuel. Or so it was thought 40 years ago when Fidel, Sr. decided what Fidel, Jr. should study; but as with his embrace of Communism as an economic system, Fidel the father committed a grievous miscalculation. Not as bad a miscalculation as plunging 11 million people into abject poverty; but bad enough as concerned the future of his first-born.

Unfortunately for Fidelito, nuclear scientists are not much in vogue nowadays. In fact, they represent all that is considered vile and unregenerate in society. Can't get much traction from that. So Fidelito had to be repackaged as something more benign and fuzzy though just as addlebrained and fanatic. Whom else? Al Gore.

Yes, Fidel Castro, Junior (as he's soon to be styled) has been tansmogrified into an expert on the environment and global warming. He has even authored a book — well, he's edited it, anyway, no pidas peras al olmo — where he presents the same Doomsday scenario as the Sage of Tennessee and calls for the same life-draining "solutions."

Fidelito really needs a better editor and copywriter. The name of his book is poison: Science, Technology and Innovation. It was Granma that presented the stage for Fidelito's enthronement as Cuba's embassador to Greenpeace. He gave a lecture to the editors of the party-screed and received prominent coverage in it. The lecture, according to Granma (May 9), concerned "the grave consequences of global warming and the crisis that would be created by the depletion of non-renewable energy sources." Wow! That would create a "crisis?" Why doesn't Fidelito, nuclear scientist and sometime head of Cuba's Nuclear Energy Commission, tackle that problem? Because that man is dead. Daddy decreed that, too. Now Fidelito is an expert on global warming and saving the planet because his father has discovered the "evil" of ethanol, and though he may not succeed him as his political heir, Fidelito will certainly carry-on the family tradition for spurious expertise in all areas of human knowledge (again, shades of Al Gore).

The article notes that Fidelito gave out copies of his book to the grateful editors of Granma, who will certainly know what to do with them. He is seen in the act of autographing his (other people's) rather thin book.

5 comments:

Charlie Bravo said...

Manuel, we have information -published some time ago on KillCastro that raul taked about his impending retirement that we place after the much awaited state funeral. In that meeting he surprised all the hopeful communist honchos by directly appointing fidelito as the head to be of the release 3.0 of the tyranny. Now that his father allows him to utter a few nonsensical sentences about the environment, his future ascension to power seems more possible. He has cousins in congress, and the left loves him!

Vana said...

Those grateful editors at Granma will soon be wiping their asses with Fidelitos book, i'm sure that's all is good for

Albert Quiroga said...

Have often wondered how many gallons of usable fossil fuel - which still produces the most bang for the buck - could be rendered out of useless fossils; since fc sr is so concerned about the "evils of ethanol," why not encourage him to show his "love and dedication to humanity" by immolating himself in the nearest crematorium? fidelito jr is free to follow him, and Al Bore to boot - just make sure the chimney is properly equipped with a s...t, I mean an ash-scrubber. It's the environmentally-correct thing to do. And we might get a gallon or two of pooh-troleum out of the experience. More corn for the masses. Seems like a no-brainer to me...

Manuel A.Tellechea said...

Alberto:

An interesting idea and one which should not be voluntary on their part.

Enric said...

Now THAT'S a funny headline.