Saturday, July 7, 2007

Why Hillary Clinton Wouldn't Be So Bad After All

1). She has made Bill Clinton miserable for 30+ years and promises to keep him that way for many more.

2). Four more years of public celibacy for Bill.

3). She hates and does not trust Bill's friends.

4). She can be bought with money or land (or any combination thereof).

5). The liberal causes she most cares about (e.g. universal health care) she manages to torpedo.

6). As president she would be a bigger SOB than the men just to prove women can be and because it comes naturally to her.

7). Her old Cuban friends are dead or dying.

8) She is in favor of the embargo and has voted to uphold it (the only Democratic candidate who has done so).

9). She knows better than to say "¡Venceremos! ¡Patria o Muerte!" publicly.

10). She stands up for Cuban balseros who are not 7 years old and helpless or deportable under the "Dry Foot/Wet Foot" policy.

You are cordially requested to submit other reasons real or facetious why Cuban exiles should consider voting for Hillary Clinton.


Charlie Bravo said...

11) apparently, she knows how to cut sugar cane.

(No, the Fanjuls didn't teach her, they don't know how to do it. She learnt in Cuba, and I asked one of her campaigners for that particular photo, autographed if possible.... deeply doubt I will ever get it in the mail!)

Charlie Bravo said...

12) It would be a riot seeing her wearing a guayabera, stumbling in Spanish, and making faces with a cafecito while campaigning in South Florida.

Agustin Farinas said...

She will prohibit her husband from breaking the embargo and buying any Cuban cigars, knowing full well what kind of use he gives them. And I don't mean smoking them. No Cuban cigars for Bill. LOL.

CorgiGuy said...

13) Hillary is 2 for 1 type of deal. If you vote for Hillary you get Bill with it, maybe be Monica too. What a Deal!

Vana said...

14) Bill as first man, I don't think so, sorry can't stand the sight of that man.
15) They wont lift the paper embargo, the dry foot wet foot we hate, will stay in place, next

Vana said...

Oh I see you want me to say something
16)She did stand up for the balseros, that's the only good thing, I can think of.

CorgiGuy said...

14 ) A recent CNN poll found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she’s strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.