Who Shall Be Inducted First?
As if I need to ask.Latest Intelligence: Ambassador Fantomas has fled across the border to Babalunia just ahead of the guys with the nets.
Later Intelligence: Fantomas is arrested at border under a charge of Treason for having continually asserted his independence from Val without Val's permission.
Still Later Intelligence: Fantomas is made a trustee in prison. At the first opportunity, he breaks the trust and runs away. Fantomas is at large.
Much Later Intelligence: The fugitive Fantomas re-enters RCAB territory as an illegal migrant.
Last Intelligence: Fantomas hides out in an empty building that turns out to be the RCAB Madhouse. Discovered, he is given asylum there as an inmate.
Fantomas is in The Madhouse.
RULES OF THE MADHOUSE
1). An inmate of The Madhouse may only comment in The Madhouse.
2). If an inmate attempts to comment anywhere else, his comments will be transferred to The Madhouse.
3). An inmate may petition for his release at any time subject to the approval of Vana and Agustin, Administrators of The Madhouse, who alone shall determine whether he has been restored to sanity and civility.
371 comments:
1 – 200 of 371 Newer› Newest»Fantomas:
I thought that I would be the first to pay you a visit in The Madhouse. Let me assure you that you will be treated with compassion and humanity at all times during the duration of your stay here. It is our hope that your stay here will be profitable and hasten your restoration to civil society in the fullness of time. Of course, that is a decision that only Vana and Agustín can make so I should advice you to endeavor at all times to comport yourself with due obeisance to them. Your stay here can be as hard or as easy as you choose to make it. Good luck.
And I (we) want to be the second to pay you a visit in The Madhouse and release you. Our other selves, Vana and Agustín, fought against this release. Vana especially. She (we) can be such a bitch at times. Evern though you did not comport yourself with due obeisance to them, I (we) decided to be magnanimous and issue the release. (Doesn't it thrill you when I use words like "obeisance" snd "comport"?)
Congratulations on your release, and don't forget to pick up an autographed picture of me (us) on your way out.
Medical Report #1
The patient fantomas was administered an enema this morning, which his visiting friend Mr.Chechechea insisted on applying himself. We have referred Mr. Chechechea to the Administration because we think he might also benefit from treatment here as he appears to be afflicted with multiple personality disorder.
After his enema, Mr. Fantomas was given a breakfast consisting of a thick gruel of heterogenous vegetables and a glass of warm goat's milk.
He seemed tired after his wanderings and grateful for the attention he is receiving.
Medical Report #2
Patient fantomas was given the first of his three daily ablutions with buckets of ice water. He received the prescribed treatment with as much grace as can be expected under the circumstances.
Mr. Fantomas is now cursing a certain "Val Prieto" and heaping words of just praise on the founder of our charitable institution and its worthy administrators.
Manuel,
Let's keep the Fanto on a steady diet of the antipsychotic Thorazine for breakfast, lunch and dinner for a least a year. If he responds to treatment, then we can allow him access to his PC again, but only for short while.
While he is there, you may want to have Mr. Chechechea join him there also, to keep him company while he is in treatment too, after all we don't want the Fanto to be lonely. Mr. Ch. seems to be suffering from delusional paranoia much worse than the Fanto. It seems both were last seen trying to read the translation of Marti's verses into Hindi, and neither one of them could make heads or tails of it and kept repeating the same verse over and over again.
SECOND BEST QUOTE OF THE CENTURY
"A BAD NAME , MANUEL YOU GIVES US ALL CUBANS A BAD NAME"
Fantomas july 16, 2007
You should get inside the mad cage and throw away the key ...forever...
sorry the koolaid kids wont save you
that house picture is scary professor
is that the house where you keep your sex slaves 12 year old kids, sick man
Release them Tellechea...
You did it this time , you have declare open war on Fantomas,,brace yourself for the
onslaught
Comport this analfabeto
Vana,
Bolt down your windows and doors! The psycho is on the loose. Keep your Corgie inside too, just in case he is fond of dogs. Get ready for the onslaught. In the meantime,let me get another glass of Kool Aid while I plan my own defense. Keep a sharp lookout.
Medical Report #3:
The patient fantomas suddenly became irrational and abusive. It was necessary to constrain him and withdraw his "Etch a Sketch" privileges. We have prescribed for him Thorazine as well as all drugs found in Al Gore, Jr.'s possession when he was stopped for reckless driving except for the marijuana.
Mr. Fantomas appears to have a fixation with 12-year old sex slaves which may require chemical castration. Surgical castration appears to be impossible because of retraction of the phallus, also known as concealed penis syndrome.
Manuel,
I was laughing so hard I almost spilled my Kool Aid when I read your last commentary.
The wonders of having a dual personality!. While one hangs around here blabering inanities, the other one is at work trying to earn a living. I guess this must be one the advantages of schizophrenia.
LOL
Mr Comport (lol) have you ever written a script for Holywood
this is your time to shine
go for it
SUPER QUOTE OF ALL TIME..HISTORY OF THE WORLD
MANUEL TELLECHEA: THE END IS NEAR..
IF FANTOMAS DECIDES NOT TO COMMENT ANYMORE IT WILL BRING DESTRUCTION AND SUDDEN DEATH TO THIS BLOG
Medical Report #4
We have received a request for release from Mr. Fantomas, written on the confiscated "Etch a Sketch." It is being passed on to Agustín and Vana for a final determination. At this time, it is impossible for the medical staff to recommend his release. In fact, Mr. Fantomas' condition appears to have deteriorated in the last hour, as he appears now to be suffering from delusions of grandeur.
Medical Report #5
Patient Fantomas is complaining of boils on his buttocks. A soothing unguent of crushed mustard seed and turpentine was applied by Mr. Chechechea, here for his 2nd visit today.
Lmao, I spilled my Kool Aid Espresso, seems to me our patient is getting desperate, and not responding well to treatment, I say we get him ready for electric shock, while we keep the enema in place, maybe is the condom on the head that is asphixiating all reason, I recommend removal of same....LMAO
Medical Report #6
It was finally possible to weigh Mr. Fantomas who had resisted all previous attempts to do so. He is currently at 316 lbs, which is considered morbidly obese for someone his height (5'4"). We are contacting a dietician and a physical culturist. Mr. Chechechea has volunteered to give Mr. Fantomas massages to firm up his muscle tone. We wished him luck finding that muscle.
Medical Report #7
Mr. Fantomas is being prepared for emergency surgery. We hope to be able to remove or at least trim away the prophylactic stuck on his head and unconceal his concealed penis. The prophylactic on his head was probably an attempt to compensate for same.
Vana & Agustín:
You must rule on Fantomas' request for release as transmitted to you on his "Etch a Sketch."
Medical Report #8
Patient fantomas, before being wheeled into surgery, was hallucinating about "thousands of comments." He had previously discounted the importance of comments. He does appear to alternate between silence and logorrhea. Mr. Fantomas should awaken from sedation by Thursday at the latest. If all goes well, a lobotomy may also be performed.
Seems the hallucination is getting out of control, I also recommend sedation until Thursday, in the meantime keep up the massage that Mr chechechea is so kindly providing, maybe through complete relaxation the prophylactic may be removed, also the enema must be kept in place at all cost, sorry but this staff member has a dental appointment, will return shortly to help with the surgery, in the meantime please do not remove him from the padded room, as is my humble opinion he may try suicide...LMAO...sorry can't stop laughing
Release denied for the time being, as was suggested to me, through my Etch A Sketch....
Medical Report #9
FLATLINE!!!
______________________________
FLATLINE!!!
Manuel and Vana,
obviously the thorazine has had its effects as we do not hear from the patient for a while now.
Hopefully he is resting comfortably. I second Vanas's opinion and recommend the patient continues being held by the straight jacket and the enema kept in place until Thursday. Sadly we thought he was making some progress, and now we find out he also is hallucinating with delusions of grandeur.
I strongly recommend the same treatment for the other patient, the one called Mr. Ch., with the additional electro shocks in the mornings for good measure.
Oh but I am not a patient, Agustin. I am Manuel, the real Manuel. Gaze upon my photo to see the real me, the undiluted me, the me that I love so. Better watch it Agustinito, or I'll have to strap you down and give you an enema too. I'll even read the versos sencillos to you while I do it. Then we can both do Vana.
Medical Report #10
The heroic efforts of our dedicated surgeons succeeded in restoring Mr. Fantomas' vital signs. However, it was impossible to resume normal circulation to his extremities, so it was necessary to amputate both legs above the knees.
It also proved impossible to remove the prophylactic mask from Mr. Fantomas' head which had melded into his skin. Our surgeons were able to harvest copious flesh from his posterior and engraft it around his head and face entirely covering the prophylactic.
As no phallus was evident concealed or otherwise, our surgeons have created an artificial vagina for the now Mrs. Fantomas.
Overall the surgical interventions on Mr. Fantomas must be judged to have been entirely satisfactory. His head and face are a vast improvement over his former appearance, though admittedly somewhat grotesque, which is more a function of heredity than anything else. He has lost 100 lbs through the otherwise unfortunate amputation of his legs. And with the creation of an artificial vagina he will be able to have sex for the first time in his life.
The lobotomy was not performed because it was judged to be too stressful to his system at this time. Tomorrow, perhaps.
Mr. cheche,
Good try, but no cigar. You do not even come close to the real thing, no matter how hard you try. You will need much improvement to pass as the real thing. Sorry, go back to your psychology books and keep trying.
While you are at it, don't forget to take your own medicine and keep refilling Fanto's anal medicine. Who knows with a little effort there may still be a recovery for him. You, I doubt it. Remember when you try to post as the real thing: segundos papeles nunca fueron buenos! Yours is not even that, is a real cheap imitation.
Oh my God, I have not laughed this hard in a long time.
Seems the patient is stabilized until Thursday, lets keep her in the padded room while keeping the straight jacket on, we have to wait and see if the grafts taken from his/her posterior will take, or if he/her needs anti rejection medication, in the mean time Agustin don't forget to order the stumps for his/her legs, since that is all her insurance will pay for, seems Mr chechechea will also need treatment since he seems sexually deviant having suggested a threesome....I have jotted it all down in my Etch A Sketch for future reference...LMAO
Bulletin #1
Since Mr. Chechechea has acted as Mr. Fantomas' handmaiden since he was first admitted to The Madhouse, it is only fair that we extend to him overnight privileges here. Now that their gender roles have been reversed, it is especially important that Mr. Fantomas and Mr. Chechechea be given the time to adjust to the new circumstances.
Mr. Chechechea, as both Vana and Agustín have observed, is more than qualified to be admitted in his own right as a patient, and may, indeed, have an even greater need that Mr. Fantomas for our attention, but we are not in a position to underwrite the cost of his treatment. We have already spent over $1 million on Mr. Fantomas' care in just one day, monies that will not be reimbursed to us because Mr. Fantomas is an illegal immigrant from Babalunia.
Ahhh geez Manuel are we allowed to treat illigal aliens? better jot that down on my Etch A Sketch, are we treating ALL Babalunians for free? that may prove to be quite expensive, since there are quite a few of them......LOL
Vana:
Not only are there many Babalunians, but most are in even worse shape than was fantomas. If we were to open our borders, we would indeed be swamped with mendicants. And now that they have seen what we have done for fantomas, they will no doubt redouble their efforts to infiltrate our fair domain.
Vana:
The problem is that most of them are assholes. So it really could be any of them. But I know how to chase away their kind. Witness Lechero. A little dose of his own medicine and he was sent scrambling home to papa bear.
Manuel:
How right you are when you say, all are assholes, we shall soon fill up the Madhouse, ah but the thing is the Madhouse welcomes all, so watch out you Babalunians, seems we do accept illegal aliens...lol
Ahhh, and you know how well I (we) know assholes. There is nothing like personal experience...
Chechechea:
I am sure that your personal knowledge of assholes is extensive and growing.
Now go back to taking care of fantomas. Don't forget to spread the unguent.
If you guys can't handle the patient
There is room here at the HOTEL CALIFORNIA, A LOVELY PLACE sweet smell of COLITAS everywhere, he'll will be able to CHECK OUT ANY TIME HE LIKES but he won't be able TO LEAVE.
Just trying to helpout!
----------------------
Hotel California, eagles
On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of colitas, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night
There she stood in the doorway;
I heard the mission bell
And I was thinking to myself,
’this could be heaven or this could be hell’
Then she lit up a candle and she showed me the way
There were voices down the corridor,
I thought I heard them say...
Welcome to the hotel california
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely face
Plenty of room at the hotel california
Any time of year, you can find it here
Her mind is tiffany-twisted, she got the mercedes bends
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls friends
How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat.
Some dance to remember, some dance to forget
So I called up the captain,
’please bring me my wine’
He said, ’we haven’t had that spirit here since nineteen sixty nine’
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say...
Welcome to the hotel california
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely face
They livin’ it up at the hotel california
What a nice surprise, bring your alibis
Mirrors on the ceiling,
The pink champagne on ice
And she said ’we are all just prisoners here, of our own device’
And in the master’s chambers,
They gathered for the feast
The stab it with their steely knives,
But they just can’t kill the beast
Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
’relax,’ said the night man,
We are programmed to receive.
You can checkout any time you like,
But you can never leave!
corgiguy:
He has no legs. Fantomas is not walking out any time soon. Or later. Agustín has promised to whittle him some legs, but that drywood from the Pampas is hard and it could take some time. On the positive side, fantomas had stumpy little legs to begin with, so, really, he's not that much closer to the ground than he was before.
No Legs, Ouch! You cut his legs off? That's cruel, Does still have his cabina?
What about the oxigen?
Corgiguy:
I love that song! thanks
As Manuel said, condom head is now a she with no legs..lol..so he wont be leaving until released, which will not be for sometime yet
corgiguy:
It was done to save his life. Would you had rather that we led him die? Read all the medical reports, 1-10.
What record? The record for the amount of comments two people (Tocayo is responsible for at least three of these characters) can make on one post? Talk about an ignominious distinction!
In my opinion this patient suffers from COGNITIVE DISSONANCE. Have you consider euthanasia?
Lechero:
Lechero, old man, I said "report" not "record." I guess you were very anxious to join the discussion. I see that you still remain unable to count, which is pretty ignominious. And stupid. The participants in this discussion have been six: there is me, Vana, Agustín, Fantomas, Corgiguy, yourself and your double chechechea. That makes a total of six, not two people. Six people are perfect for a thread of 45 comments.
Actually, there is I (the real Manuel), you (the anti-Manuel), and our other selves, "Vana" (who wears nothing but chiffon and silk (because I know you, the anti-Manuel loves how it feels on your crusty old skin), and CorgiGuy (the intelligent dog being from Sirius we allowed to join us). Add Agustin, Manuel el Lechero (the other false Manuel), and of course the inmate Fantomas. That makes the four of us in here together, plus the three interlopers.
I beg you, even though I hate you, my other less intelligent self, I beg you not to take those nasty pills that rid you of us. We want to live!
Hey mr cheche Well Dog my Cat! I bring peace, can't you smell the colitas?
Doctor, run the inmates are lose, we need two more straight jackets, for lechero and checheche, who I think is a che lover, with all those che's in his name, we DO NOT TOLERATE che lovers in the Madhouse!, think we will have to admit them, and apply the same treatment that Fanta got, maybe even lobotomies, and a lot of Thorazine, Valium cocktails.
It is possible to have a lot of comments by a handful of people, that means we ENJOY ourselves HERE, and love to come back again and again throughout the day, to see what's going on, there is always something going on HERE, Manuel makes it FUN, obviously you guys ENJOY it too, for you keep coming back
Thorazine and Valium, that sounds like cruelty. All patients must be treated without cruelty. I say cut the oxygen
Medical Report #11
Ms. Fantomas awakened from anesthesia without incident and was overwhelmed by the amount and level of care which she has been afforded during her stay here. She asked to see the administrators, no doubt to convey personally to them her gratitude for the transformation she has undergone.
Although in a somewhat exitable state and flapping her arms as if she wished to achieve flight, the physical limitations under which she presently labors made it impossible for her to gain much altitude.
The engrafted skin on her face appears to be peeling, indicating the need for additional sutures or even more grafts. Fortunately her posterior can still be cultivated for many years to come should it be necessary.
The patient's new vagina, assisted by the exertions of Mr. Chechechea while she was still unconscious, exhibits a normal appearance externally and is what it is internally.
The loss of her lower limbs did appear to consternate her, a not unexpected reaction. It was explained to Ms. Fantomas that she was actually lucky that her limbs were amputated in the sterile environment of an operating room rather than on, say, a railroad track, where no medical care may have been available, causing her to bleed to death or making her torso a prey to sundry animals. She seemed to understand the implications of this statement and made no further remonstrances.
Her condition has not stabilized sufficiently to perform the indicated lobotomy (more indicated now than before), but all her teeth will be extracted today to further her recovery, as the bacteria from them may be a contributing factor to her mental illness.
Medical Report #12
The patient fantomas continues to make a remarkable recovery. She's her old self again this morning, wallowing in her excrement and soliciting the favors of Mr. Chechechea. She was fed her usual breakfast to which was added at her request a compote of peas.
She also claims to have begun menstruating and asked to be provided with feminine napkins.
She will be washed later with carbolic acid and furnished with clothes more appropriate to her new gender.
I wish to commend Vana and Agustín for their exemplary conduct as administrators of The RCAB Madhouse. Their generosity and selflessness is an example to all, as is their humanity; for they undertook to save the life of a man who had behaved despicably towards them.
I am therefore awarding Agustín and Vana The RCAB Order of Merit, First Class.
Today I paid my second visit to fantomas at The Madhouse. I can honestly say that I have never seen her looking better. Definitely, the less of fantomas there is, the better.
I am sorry to say, however, that her mental state remains unchanged. She is fulminating excommunications and anathemas and obviously appears to believe that she speaks for the Cuban people.
Thank God that of all the calamities that have befallen our country over the last 48 years, we at least been spared that.
Fantomas presented me with her second formal request for release written with her own excrement on the bedsheets. I photographed the bedsheet with my cellphone and will be transmitting her request to Vana and Agustín.
Medical Report #13:
Extensive psychoanalysis has revealed the real cause of patient fantomas' discontent. It seems that he is upset with Val Prieto for not having chosen him as one of the 5 new members of his cabinet. This snub wounded his self-pride, but rather than turn against Val he has chosen to attack his enemies, a classic case of projection and displacement.
Don't think the patient tolerated the anesthesia, since she has come out of it farting and cussing, and screaming, does seem he enjoyed the massage Mr che-che-che provided, specially the one he gave her in the vagina, for she keeps calling his name, it is my humble opinion that miss Fanta is not ready for release, not quite yet, as noted on my Etch A Sketch, while seeping my Kool Aid
fantomas:
It saddens me to see the veiled contempt and condescension with which the BUCLers treat you. Even you, in denial as you are, cannot have failed to notice on some level the impact which their rejection has had on you. In fact, their disdain has instilled in you an inferiority complex of huge proportions, which manifests itself in clownishness and empty bravado. If you cannot sit on the dais with the king, you are content to be the court jester at his feet. Yet you, fantomas, are not in any way inferior to him. He has made you think you are and you in turn have acted as if you were. Do not live on your knees, fantomas (even if that were still possible). Arise, fantomas (even if that were still possible) and claim your condition as a man. Stunted and neutered, but a man nonetheless. Then, perhaps, you will know who has been your best friend and benefactor.
Manuel and Vana,
Ms. Fanto is having other delusions too. Now he wants his handlers to act as Papal acolytes.
"traime jabon para que me limpies los pies".
No only delusions of grandeur but now he has Papal delusions. This is much worse than I thought. Even with no legs he still wants someone to wash his feet. Perhaps we exceeded the Thorazine dosage and went a bit too far. We may need a pepper enema with sulfuric acid to counteract the Thorazine. In the meantime has anyone from the Madhouse Administration staff asked Ms. Fanto for his green card? If he does not have one, he is not entitled to treatment there and is subject to deportation back to his country of origin, Fantolandia.
Manuel:
You have been more than tolerant and amicable towards Ms Fanta, how does she repay you? by being insulting to you and everyone in here, never sticks to the subject, she wants to make of this blog a sham, a joke, is all relajo with her, I tried for five minutes to be civil, I should have from the start listened to myself, I do not trust her/him, she just wreaks havoc every where she goes, the Madhouse is where she belongs.
Agustin:
Your assesment is right, how can we wash feet she does not have...LOL...I think is what they call ghost pain, she keeps screaming for che che to massage her, and lechero to breast feed her, I don't believe she is yet ready for release, we need to increase the psychotic medication, please jot that down in your Etch A Sketch, for Doctor approval
Agustín:
I second Vana. That is the best line here: "How can we wash his feet if he doesn't have any?" Unless, of course, he crawled at night to the garbage bins, grabbed one of his severed feet and stuck it in his mouth. In fact, he always had his foot in his mouth.
Vana, Agustin , Manuel
Did you know that all the comments , insults and comport that you write gets in the internet via the search engines inmediately..
Do we want people to really know that stuff?
Are we working for cuba or playing like the caged 12 year olds kids that Manuel takes to bed with him everynight...
Responde viejo satiro
Medical Report #14
The patient fantomas has regressed and begun to hallucinate outloud.
He is shouting "Amy, I love you Amy Vino de Casa."
Can anyone shed light on this mystery?
He also says that he want little kids to play with. Although they are his intellectual peers, we fear that fantomas would not be a good influence on children. Or adults, for that matter.
Here's some objective information about the pecking order of blogs.
Technorati ranking for Tocayo's jealous rage blog (AKA Review of Cuban-American Blogs): 700,100
Ranking for the "Madhouse" AKA Babalublog: Rank: 5,635
Keep it up Tocayo, with all your comments you might break the 700,000 barrier any day now. Then you can report your accomplishment to your DGI handlers in Havana with your shortwave radio.
Lechero is in the house, came in just in time to breast feed Ms Fanta, she seems satisfied and is now resting calmly, seems che che is running late today, we need him in order to massage that foot outta Fanta's mouth, can someone please, place an emergency call to che che, MS Fanta will be waking soon, and we don't want to upset her, or will have to doubly medicate her.
Lechero:
Technorati rankings are meaningless except to Technorati. All they tell you is how many people access a site from Technorati.
If I spent all my time as you do, accessing your own blog from Technorati, my numbers would also rise. But I have more important things to do.
You mention the DGI so often that you already have me convinced that you are an "asset." Some asset! Now I know my side is going to win.
Lechero:
You asked when I was going to "break" 700,000 on Technorati? Actually RCAB is ranked 642,313 at this moment. Broke it pretty fast, didn't I? And I am not even a member. Or, rather, I wasn't a member. I just became one by your kind suggestion. Let's see what happens now that my blog is actually listed on Technorati. Of course, as I said, this is only a popularity poll among users of Technorati. Meaningless except to gauge your blog's appeal on Technorati itself. There's a lot more in the blogosphere than Technorati.
Did you know that all the comments, insults and comport that you write gets in the internet via the search engines inmediately... Do we want people to really know that stuff? — fantomas
Touchy, touchy.
I have no problem. I should think you would have even less of a problem since you don't use your real name. Come to think of it, perhaps I should give your real name to stop you from making pedophilic comments. [Sort of what happened at Oscar Corral's blog, isn't it?] What do you think?
Ah the old bait and switch. I say technorati and you say RCAB. So where is Babalu rated on RCAB? Without even looking it up I can guess that it's much closer to number 1 than the blog of jealous rage that you have created here.
And technorati monitors traffic to blogs and inbound links. Unfortunately you don't rate very highly for either.
But keep the faith tocayo, people will find your meldown entertaining and come here to gawk.
Manuel,
Your Superiorness, Nutty Professor, Animalazo. Gee, at the rate you are collectig names, Ms. Fanto and his gang of acolytes are going to run out of names to call you. Judging by the ire and wrath you are arousing with these folks, you must be touching a raw nerve with them. By now Ms. Fanto's face must be red instead of pale white. Good, a change of color is probably more becoming to his face, I never liked that pale white color in the picture anyway.It made him/her look like some device for protection against a sexually transmitted disease.
fantomas:
Calm down or we may have to sedate you the old-fashioned way. Are you upset to have received a dose of your own medicine here? You have certainly proved that you can dish it but you can't take it.
Don't worry, I am not going to reveal your real name. It would serve you right and I would be right to do so; but I am a gentleman, fantomas, and don't blackmail even blackguards to obtain my ends.
But do behave from now on.
Lechero:
You have it wrong: it's Babalú that's afraid of me, not the other way around. You see, I have linked to Babalú 50, 60, 80 times. When Val actually devoted an entire post to attacking me on Babalú he never once cited the comments that he found offensive much less the URL where the offending post might be found. When someone requested that he do so, Val immediately deleted the entire post and thread. He preferred to cut and run rather than have his readers exposed to my criticism of him (and cut and run on his very own blog!). He is afraid of my own words. If it were only a joke to him, he would have no difficulty linking this blog. But he is afraid. Very afraid. And he should be afraid because every person he meets mentions my name to him, which is the same as telling him that they have laughed hard at his expense. The torment never ends for Val because fear, too, is an obsession.
Título del mensaje: Medición para hombres en la escala entre MACHO y mariconazo
manuel haz este examen a ver que numero te sale..y preocupate
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. REGALOS QUE PREFIERE RECIBIR
Una Botella de Vino o Copete Fuerte ..............(MACHO)
Una Libro o Ropa............................................(FINO)
Bombones o Chocolate ...................................(MEDIO **LEA EL DECALOGO DEL FORISTA**)
Flores o bronceador ........................................(MARICONAZO)
2. USO DE CREMAS Y BRONCEADORES
No usa...........................................................(M ACHOTE)
Usa sólo en vacaciones de verano ..................(DELICADO)
Usa todo el verano ........................................(MARIQUITA)
Usa todo el año ............................................(MARICONAZO)
3. MASCOTAS
No tiene....................................................(REA L MACHOTE)
Su perro está en el patio............................(HOMBRE)
Su perro vive dentro de la casa..................(FLETAZO)
Tiene gato.................................................(ES NIÑITA)
4. LAS PLANTAS
Se las come ..............................................(RAMBO)
No tiene. ..................................................(MACHO)
Cuando se acuerda la riega........................(FLORIPONDIO)
Riega, poda y habla con plantas ................(**LEA EL DECALOGO DEL FORISTA** Y LOCO)
Inclina su tronco para acariciarlas ..............(MARICONAZO)
5. EL ESPEJO
No usa...........................................................(VIKINGO)
Sólo para peinarse..........................................(HOMBRE)
Se mira el cutis y observa sus músculos...........(GAY)
Además se mira los glúteos.............................(LOCA DE PATIO)
Se mira con pelucas y vestidos ......................(TRAVESTI)
6. PEINADO
No se peina.................................................(PELADO)
Se peina después de ducharse......................(HOMBRECITO)
Se peina varias veces al día .........................(MIIIIISH)
Se peina mucho y usa tintura........................(MARICONAZO)
Peina a otros y aconseja..............................(SE LA COME ATRAVESADA)
7. LIMPIEZA DOMICILIARIA
Apenas se lava él .......................................(MACHOTE HEDIONDO)
Limpia sus cosas........................................(ROMÁNTICO)
Limpia con agua ........................................(MARACO PREOCUPADO)
Limpia con agua y detergentes....................(MARAQUITO)
Además usa aspiradora o plumero .............(COLIZÓN)
8. DEPORTES
Fútbol, Tenis, Boxeo, Automovilismo ................(MACHOTE)
Básquet, Bowling, Voleibol................................(CORDERITO)
Aeróbica, Spinning ...........................................(UUUUUYYYYYY)
Lo mismo, pero con short de lycra ....................(LOCA ENYEGÜECIDA!)
9. COMIDAS PREFERIDAS
Animales asados, ají, wasabi ............................(TARZÁN)
Pescado y ensalada ..........................................(METROSEXUAL)
Aves acompañadas con vegetales al vapor.........(MARACO CON CUÁTICA)
10. BEBIDAS PREFERIDAS
Pisco, Ron, Tequila o Vodka solo ..................(REAL MACHOTE)
Vino ..............................................................(REFINADO)
Pipeño o Chicha ............................................(BORRACHÍN)
Bayleis y agua mineral.....................................(MARIPOSON)
Primavera sin licor..........................................(DEVORA P)
11. ASEO PERSONAL
Ducha con agua helada ...................................(LEGIONARIO)
Ducha con jabón y champú .............................(VARÓN)
Ducha larga con jabón líquido y pañito ............(HUECAZO)
Baño con sales y espuma ................................(ULTRA COLIZA)
12. LA CERVEZA
Bien helada y por litros .................................(MACHOTE)
Sólo una para el calor....................................(AMANERADO)
Lemon Stone ................................................(MARICÓN)
Sin alcohol ....................................................(MARICÓN MENTIROSO)
13. CUIDADO DEL AUTO
No lo lava ........................................(MACHOTE)
Lo lava 1 vez al mes .........................(VARÓN FLOJO)
1 vez a la semana .............................(GALÁN PERNO)
Lo aspira en su interior......................(AHUECADO)
Además le pone silicona ...................(ENTERO HUECO)
14. TELEVISIÓN
Sólo las noticias ................................(MACHO INFORMADO)
Programa de Farándula .....................(VIEJO CALIENTE)
Películas ...........................................(SENSIBLE)
Teleseries..........................................(HUECO)
Realitys.............................................(RECONTRA GAY)
15. CONOCIMIENTO DE LOS COLORES
Los Primarios ......................................(MACHO)
Más el verde y café .............................(VARÓN)
Más morado y anaranjado ...................(RARO)
Más fucsia, beige y marengo ................(COLIZA)
Más azulino, magenta y bermellón ........(PUTO DE ESQUINA)
Más paquete de vela ...........................(REALMENTE NIÑA)
16. LOS OLORES
A sudor, peo y pata ...........................(MACHOTE)
A poto ..............................................(WEON COCHINO)
A desodorante ..................................(DELICADITO)
A perfume ........................................(FLETO)
A aceite emulsionado .......................(TRAVESTI DE CABARET)
Si usted tiene al menos 1 característica dudosa, preocúpese, se está pasando a flor.
Si tiene de 2 a 4 se puede considerar en vías de mariconeo.
Si tiene de 5 a 8 no se considere..., ya es fleto no hay vuelta atrás.
Si tiene más de 8, yo no lo conozco ni ha visitado este sitio web.
unos cuantos con pesadilla esta noche,,???? JEJEJEJE
Medical Report #14
The dementia continues unabated. Patient Fantomas is at once paederistic and homophobic. Unable or unwilling to accept his natural impulses, he is unduly curious about others. It may be necessary to investigate the patient's family history and other personal details to unlock the enigma of his personality.
Today patient fantomas was relieved of all teeth to eliminate infections caused by leaching from metal fillings that may be a contributing factor to his mental collapse.
Another sign of that deterioration was evident today when his bladder exploded because he could not decide whether he was male or female, and, hence, whether he should urinate standing up (a moot point) or sitting down (also a moot point).
We find it difficult also to surmise what his sexual orientation should be, though we still hold out the hope that he will embrace lesbianism as the middle course.
Bulletin #2
Valentín I, Holy Cuban Emperor and Pontifex Maximus of the Babalunian Empire, Lord Protector of BUCL and its client states and "Dean of Cuban-American bloggers," has requested a license to enter our domain in order to pay a visit to fantomas. His request has been granted.
What is this? someone is NOT doing their job! I thought the patient was sedated until Thursday, he has awoken in a funk, with homophobic inclinations, and putting us to a test WTF? we must use stronger sedatives, since his artificial vagina surgery he's not sure if he should urinate, standing or sitting, But how can he stand, he has no legs! I don't believe the stumps have arrived from Argentina quite yet, Think the time for the lobotomy has arrived, we cannot wait any longer.
Vana:
You are right. Time is of the essence. But before the lobotomy is performed fantomas will be afforded the opportunity to meet with his mentor Val Prieto at Prieto's request. Mr. Prieto is expected shortly at The Madhouse as reports indicate he has already crossed the border. If he desires to take fantomas back to Babalunia with him, should we let him? It will mean almost certain execution but we can hardly influence fantomas' relations with Mr. Prieto, who has lately, incidentally, taken on certain imperial attributes.
Bulletin #3
Valentín I arrived at The Madhouse with his entourage, which includes Henry, Prince of Fails, and the Royal Varlet, George Moneo. It appears that they intend to broadcast "A Tribute to Fantomas" on The Babalú [Faux] Radio Hour and have come to interview him. They also brought with them a caja china but no pig. Someone observed that it would make the perfect coffin for the new reduced fantomass (that's a pun).
Apprised of all these developments, the RCAB Foreign Affairs Office advised us to let it be.
As the emperor was not on a state visit but one strictly private in character, he was not met at the border by an official delegation nor accorded military honors. Our people did greet him with dead chickens and rotten eggs in the customary Babalunian manner.
Vana,
is funny how throughout history, those that exhibit a strong homophobia are usually homosexual themselves and are in total denial. Examples abound through history of this atrophiated behavior. Case in point, the late Roy Cohn assistan counsel to the late Senator McCarthy who was a furious and vitriolic gay basher while he was a closet homosexual himself. Not to mention some of the religious preachers on TV in the USA who were later "outed" as being gay themselves. Maybe there is something here that explains a certain behavior displayed by a commenter who shall remain nameless.
Oh No! you don't think they want to roast Ms Fanta in the caja china do you? maybe use the stumps as fuel? but they have yet to arrive! think the Babalunians got here too soon, you think we should sedate the patient and hide her? remember her artificial vagina is made of plastic, it would melt in the caja china, may even cause a fire, this certainly is an emergency....LMAO
Vana:
I don't think the Babalunians want to roast fantomas. But I do believe that they are going to attempt to spirit him away in the caja china, which as I said is just made to order. They are afraid that he has exposed or will expose Babalú's darkest secrets. After they get him over the border, they will no doubt inflict horrible tortures on him to determine what (and who) he has given away.
The question now is, should we try to stop them and allow fantomas to continue his charmed life at The Madhouse? Or should we allow fantomas to live his destiny?
Manuel, ¿que dira la familia de Tocororo y sus amistades cuando entran aqui y leen todas estas sandeces? ¿Que pensaran de ti?Anda respondeme esa. — fantomas
fantomas:
There are several threads in honor of Tocororo on this blog, which I think would comfort his family greatly. I think Tocororo himself would have enjoyed reading this particular thread. Tocororo had a great sense of humor, which you do not. And he could give as well as he could take. Which you can't.
you did not answer my question as usual
What would they say if they read this particular post...
Que pensaran de ti?
oye Chechechea I am not in the mood of figthing today
te cogo mas adelante
AQUI HAY FANTOMAS PARA RATO GUSTELE A QUIEN LE GUSTE
QUOTE OF THE FUTURE
" FANTOMAS PERDONA , PERO NUNCA OLVIDA" Y SIEMPRE SE DESQUITA
Fantomas perdona pero nunca olvida siempre se desquita.
Oh My the delusions of grendeur are getting worse, I don't know Manuel that Ms Fanta is ready for release, not quite yet, we should have a pow wow and decide what is best for the patient, to release or not to release, that is the question, or turn him lose to the Babalunians?
Fantomas:
You are very lucky I feel no malice towards your pathetic self or I might be tempted to publish not only your name but a photograph that I have of you which would make everything said here even more humorous.
Now, go play an Amy Winehouse CD ("Rehab"?) and make yourself feel better.
ME CAGO EN TU PUTA MADRE
VAMOS A VER SI TIENES LOS COJONES DE PUBLICAR LA FOTO Y EL NOMBRE
ANIMAL
ESTAS RETADO SI NO LO HACES QUEDAS COMO UNA PUTA MAS Y DEJAS DE SER GENTLEMAN DECIDE PERVERT
Manuel:
You think the Babalunians can torture him more than we have at the Madhouse? even though we did it for his own good, look how lucky he's now, we removed the festering teeth, his shrinking phalus, and removed those ugly legs of his to aid in his weight loss, if you think they can further torture him worse and without pity, then I say release him to the Babalunian mob, but it needs be done with discretion, we don't want the finger pointed at our excellent institution, the best Madhouse in the world...
Oh Oh patient is using threatening words, and cussing, my oh my, I thought he claimed he never cussed, I say off with his tongue, is not doing him any good.
Vana que disparate estas hablando
www.abajofidel.blogspot.com
feb 18, 2007
Le di un KO a Manuel
HABLA COBARDE
vamos seguroso G2 no seas cObarde y publica mi foto y nombre
todos ustedes under raul castro/ ramiro valdez payroll son iguales ..
"You have been uncovered by the masked man , manolo"
fantomas feb 18, 2007
ME CAGO EN TU PUTA MADRE. VAMOS A VER SI TIENES LOS COJONES DE PUBLICAR LA FOTO Y EL NOMBRE.
ANIMAL
ESTAS RETADO SI NO LO HACES QUEDAS COMO UNA PUTA MAS Y DEJAS DE SER GENTLEMAN. DECIDE PERVERT. — fantomas
fantomas:
So you want me to publish your name and photograph? It is publicity that you are seeking? You want to embrace the insane persona you have cultivated here? You want all your little peccadilloes to be fully googleable? Let me add masochism to all your other perversions.
As I said, listen to your beloved Amy Winehouse and let her bleatings rock you to sleep.
P.S.: I'm now copying and pasting your comments so that you will not be able to delete them. I want you to shine in all your untethered foolishness.
CHECHECHEA
cualquier publicidad que sea para que la gente entre a mi blog de denuncia es valida
te lo dije una vez y te lo repito
si estoy buscando publicidad para mi blog
I do it for the 11 million you stupid
"the biggest mistake you have made in your life was to open this blog",,,
"the second biggest mistake you have made in your life was to have angered a Fantomas"
ahora soy yo el que voy a publicar tus fotos y los secretos de tu closet pervert
I know who can provide me your pictures so that I can publish them in my blog
Vana,
off with his filthy tongue, I say. Better yet, off with his head. Here I thought he was medicated until Thursday.
Fantomas:
Your foul language and insults tells us a lot about you. Nothing we can say can top you own words to reveal your inner self. Your foul language is what is really demeaning to us Cubans. Your own words and filthy language point the accusing finger at you and comdemn you of what you accuse others. I for one, cannot endure your foul language anymore. Your insults at the owner of this blog are demeaning and have no place here. You are lucky he is very patient and has endured your insults with the patience of a saint. If I was the administrator, I would make sure that you will never be allowed here again.
Manuel,
ignore this foulmouth idiot and don't dignify his ignorance by answering him anymore. Eventually he will get tired of being ignored and will fade back to oblivion where he belongs. Good riddance I say.
Vana:
I think we can be very proud of ourselves for the excellent health care we have provided to fantomas. It has cost us over $2 million to date, money, in fact, that may soon go up in smoke.
Yes, fantomas has suffered some (inevitable) discomfort here, although "torture" may be going too far. Remember that all the procedures we performed were medically indicated and will no doubt afford him a better quality of life in the long run (no pun intended). Also, pain is no imposition on a masochist.
We have just received the peg legs that Agustín kindly whittled for fantomas, and they are a thing of beauty indeed. In fact, I am tempted to keep them myself as I could hang them in my study and say they belonged to Morgan the Pirate. But no, I am going to keep just one of them (no pirate used two) and give the other one to fantomas.
Agustín:
You are right. I have been too patient with fantomas and given him too much attention and freedom. If I have done so it is only because I always knew I had the power to destroy him. This allowed me to give him more leeway than I ordinarily would have.
I really really really feel sorry for all of you koll aid kids and the professor
como dirian en cuba
QUE CLASE DE COMEMIERDAS CABALLERO
out of touch , with cuba, the cuban people, NONE OF YOU HAVE A SHOT IN A FREE CUBA...
FANTOMAS SE ENCARGARA DE QUE ESO NO OCURRA...JAMAS
" only 4 commenters and
many more thousands in his head"
Es muy tarde Manolo
I fucking destroyed you left and right
and there is nothing you can do about it
try it
everybody knows this by now and are LOL
Bulletin #6
The delegation from Babalunia, headed by His Imperial Highness Valentín I, has just departed The Madhouse. The Royal Varlet, George Moneo, was seen carrying the caja china out. Of course, it was impossible to check its contents since all parties enjoy diplomatic immunity (even the varlet) and the box itself is considered a diplomatic purse.
We can hear Mr. Chechechea crying in the distance. He was always so attached to Mr(s). Fantomas. We fear the worst (or the best) may have happened.
The entire staff is now heading in the direction of the patient's room.
Medical Report #15:
Mr(s). Fantomas is no longer a patient of this institution.
I am going to write on my blog a post about a guy named Chechechea
just now
Manuel:
You released the patient? but he's madder than ever, with only one stump, an artificial vagina, and no teeth, he's gonna be a sight for sore eyes, when he returns to his land via Babalunia, you are right when you say torture is going too far, after all we did it for his own good, and with pity in our hearts
Manuel,
the peg legs yu now have in your possesion were whittled from the hardest wood I found here in the Pampas, that is to say "quebracho" which I think is the equivalent of the caiguaran in Cuba.
Please make sure you insert them into the patient as far as you can using the rectal canal, and perhaps in the process you can obliterate his vocal cords so he cannot utter anymore filthy words. That will be a welcome finale to an ignominious foulmouth ignoramus.
Manuel:
I must commend you, I have laughed soooo hard for three days, that my stomach musles actually hurt, think I have developed a six pack just from laughing, thank you my friend, you really do bring merriment to my life, they say laughing can cure all ills, if I had any, I'm certainly cured now...LMAO
Señores everything is ok by Fanto
after all este es el mejor circo de internet
peace and love for you
great job manny
te lo dije
si hubieses abierto el anonimi hubieras llegad a 499
que estas esperando ..deja que entren en manada tus detractores tu sabes quienes son
Agustin:
I second your opinion, the stump, remember Manuel is keeping one, should be set up his rectum so hard it will look like a tail, while obliterating his ability to talk, or write, then maybe we can rid ourselves of MS Fanta
HURRAH I think our treatment has worked, the patient is now asking for peace and love, WOW, I must say we are great doctors, and have managed the Madhouse with utmost care for the sick and demented
Agustín and Vana:
Fantomas was not formally released just as he was not formally admitted to The Madhouse. As you recall, he himself broke into the RCAB Madhouse seeking asylum from the Babalunians. And now he has been broken out of our institution by the same Babalunians. In other words, the matter has gone full circle.
We have not yet received word the Babalunians have left our territory. It is still possible that they may dump fantomas or fantomas may escape. Let us hope not.
I only regret that we were unable to perform the lobotomy. But we did everything that we could and should feel proud of ourselves for our efforts.
Manuel and Vana,
oh,oh! now we are really in trouble. The foulmouth ghost has threatened us with banishment from a free Cuba. The ultimate foulmounth censor will determine who will be allowed in Cuba and who will not. I am shaking in my pants from such a threat! That is all we need in our future, another rectal orifice turned dictator who will decide whom he allows to live there and who doesn't. I think he has lived too long under tyranny has been trained and indoctrinated in its practices and now wants to apply them here to anyone who disagrees with him.
My advice for you is to take your Thorazine with a glass of warm milk and try to get some sleep. It will do your empty head some good. It may even improve your language, although that is highly doubtful.
Vana, Agustin , Nutty P
please release me at once
fantomas july 18, 2007
I will behave " accordingly" from now on ..I learned my lessons in the Madhouse..
Thanks to all of you for the treatment...
Sincerely Mr Fanto..Ths Mrs la tengo en el cartucho y esta AFILADITA Y ENGRASADA
will act civilized ,,,will attack only if provoqued"
a new kindlrer and gentler Fanto ha nacido hoy
I KNOW WHO MY RIVALS ARE
Aw shucks,
it was a lot of fun while it lasted. We must do this again sometime. I have not had such fun ribbing someone in a long time. And the subject was perfect for the ocassion. Maybe he has seen the light and will mend his ways. I hope so, for his mental sake.
Agustín:
For your services to humanity in the person of one of its lowest specimens, you are created by these patents a Knight Commander in the Sovereign Order of Good Comport.
Vana:
For your services to humanity in the person of one of its lowest specimens, you are created by these patents Dame Commander in the Sovereign Order of Good Comport.
A gentler and kinder Ms Fanta, seems the treatment worked, and he's asking for his release, I must commend Manuel and Agustin, who have behaved without reproach, at giving the patient all the care she/he needed, seems the Madhouse is closed for now, but may reopen in the future if need be, when we encounter more stupid obnoxious, and demented souls.
Fantomas:
I am glad that you have been restored to sanity and good behavior by the tender ministrations of your worthy benefactors Vana and Agustín.
I am hopeful that you will now become a respectful and respectable member of our community.
Thank you very much Sir Tellechea, I will be at your disposal when the ocassion arises, and you are in need of my services once more, I must say that my employment at the Madhouse, was one of the most rewarding challenges I have ever had the pleasure to engage in.
Vana:
Actually, I am a conde (really).
You yourself may now use the title "Dame Vana" or "Lady Vana."
It is Agustín who is now "Sir Agustín."
And here's the rest of the story...
Of course, the Fantomas story is not yet complete. We must still relate what happened to him when he was kidnapped in the caja china by the Babalunians.
But that will wait until tomorrow.
Hint: it involves a bear.
Manuel cierra la cajita...143 was enough
the Mad House is out of order
No patients
fantomas:
Yes, The Madhouse is empty except for Mr. Chechechea who refuses to leave until you return. But he's not an official patient, just a squatter. The Madhouse is closed. Whether it shall ever open again is a decision which lies with you.
Manuel:
You are a conde? really?you mean I'm rubbing elbows with royalty? well I tell you, only on the net, would I be so lucky
Vana:
A count is a member of the nobility, not royalty. In feudal society, royalty was at the top; the nobility was in the middle; and everybody else was at the bottom. There were more subtle gradations among these classes, but essentially that was the pecking order.
So the nobility were the middle class of ancient times. That's all.
Titles of nobility today are meaningless. I knew a Cuban conde who died in a flophouse in Miami. I know Cuban marqueses who manage to eat only because they are invited to all the society parties so that the hosts can be photographed with members of the old Cuban nobility in the social pages of Diario las Américas.
So don't be overawed. It's just a title. I have never used it. Neither did my grandfather or great-grandfather.
Surely you jest Manuel, I am awed, I knew a lady once who claimed to be a marquesa, but she was so common, my family and I doubted it, we were more refined than her, but I do not doubt you, you have shown to be quite noble, your speech and the way you write makes it quite obvious, thank you for straightening me out on Royalty and Nobility
Vana:
Nobility means nothing. You have to slab on that nobility culture and noblesse oblige, that is, a willingness to serve others, for modern nobility to mirror in some faint way the ancient.
The noblest writers have never been nobles. There are many people today who are obsessed with "proving" that Shakespeare is not Shakespeare, that is, that he was not really a man of humble origins with few pretensions to culture or gentility. They would prefer him to be an earl or at least a learned man and have proposed numerous candidates that they believe, in their snobbery, are the equals of Shakespeare. Of course, no one is the equal of Shakespeare but Cervantes, and Cervantes wasn't Shakespeare nor was Shakespeare Cervantes (though they both died on the same day).
I am humbled that you admire my writing. But admire it for itself. Nobility or "blue" blood had nothing to do with it. In fact, if I had ever taken it seriously, I might have ended up like the condes and marqueses I described.
For my part,
I really like this essay. Powerful words... Is Sole in Por Chester or in Shirley NY...Salute her in my behalf
Let the Blog Bashing Begin
A blog bashing movement is underway. Manuel from Review of Cuban American blog, he got the ball rolling with his "MadHouse Clients".In all fairness, Do you people believe is important to waste energy on trash?.Geez, what a downer and waste of time. To much time is spended on this turd, I believe. All we're missing is a sappy Tiny Tim song to highlight the drama in the madhouse club.OK, so all we really did here is regurgitate a lot of existing bullshit that is already out there and confirm that there is a lot of demented bloggers out there. Wow, what insight! Don't bother spending to much time on this clown,seriously.. Lots of people are loosing respect, I'm tell you this for free. Next time I'll charge...hahahaha (jokin) What we totally neglected to talk about, is Cuba, freedom, the political prisoners, the bullshit government and their criminal regime. Is what the opportunity is calling for to denounce! By the way excuse my english grammar. I'm not exactly Merriam-Webster but I do try to get my point across. Is not cool when a blogger bashes another blogger, and that other blogger lashes back, along with an army of other bloggers bashing the original blogger, So, tell me people what type of gratification are we getting from all this waste of energy?.There's enough navel gazing going on out there, and unless there's something really interesting and different to write about, it's really just not worth it. It's much better to just read all this as a big comedy piece " The Madhouse Club" Comedy Central with demented inmates. That's about the only way I can figure it... Any ideas? I'm very aware that "A blogger can go out and make any statement about anybody, and we can't control it. That's a difficult thing," but we can "IGNORE" deranged BLOGGERS from commenting. Sometimes is good to ignore insulting remarks. Sometimes being the bigger person just makes sense. "Personally, I'm pretty sick of this high school mentally games...I'm worried about americans and the commies saying things like "These bloggers are the devil's tools for bashing each others like fools". Not, the kind of shit, I want. I don't care which side of the aisle they're on, or which blog is great or intellect..We are here to denouce the cuban government not to be their entertainment guide. So really, please try not to make this out to be a big Comemierda thing when it's not; it's just an invective-spewing that is getting old. Now, I’ll say quickly that I actually like reading Mr Manuel Blog but I just can't stomach to much fireworks with demented bloggers...Withholding names, I hate giving deranged people any spotlight.
fantomas:
It is always interesting to hear you talking about being a "bigger person." I hope that you don't just mean this in the sense of avoirdupois.
This blog is about fighting intolerance and ignorance. This means, of course, fighting the greatest monument to intolerance and ignorance that has ever been reared in our country, but also those petty despots as well who "win" battles by practicing censorship to silence their opponents. A culture of tolerance must be cultivated here because no such culture exists or can exist in our country while the Castros are in power. If we fail to do that, then we shall have failed in everything.
Yes, there is a great deal of humor in this thread, but is is not slapstick humor (except on your part). In fact, it is nothing less than an allegory on the history of our country; but you, of course, are to dense to see that. If you did understand, however, this entire thread would have been unnecessary.
As I said, fantomas, I have no ill will towards you personally. In fact, you are beginning to inspire pity in me.
you are beginning to inspire pity in me.
Beware what you say
A kinder and gentler Fantomas has his limit
Puedo desenfundar another onslaught upon you in matter of seconds
Never trust a Fantomas
the previous comment let the blog bashing begin was not of my isnspiration just in case
fantomas:
For readers who may be confused by your congenital inability to use quotation marks (you know, ""), left me clarify the hodgepodge of your recent comments. You were quoting an e-mail from a certain "Sole" who lives in Shirley, N.Y., who although claiming to detest it nonetheless proclaims "Let the Blog Bashing Begin." She is, incidentally, a constant presence on this blog the same as you are. I am glad that you two have found each other; you at least have something in common: your obsession with RCAB.
Manuel,
I am highly honored by this undeserving honor of Knight Commander in the Sovereign Order of Good Comport.
I will say without a hint of false modesty that I would have preferred to have remained a lowly commoner but I will accept this with great humility.
After all I feell honored to be in the great compamy of Sir Anthony Hopkins, Michael Caine and Paul McCartney. My congratulations to Vana also.
It was a difficult task to keep our friend in check but I think we have suucceded in the endeavor. After all he is showing signs of improvement already and this fact gladdens my heart.
As for you Manuel, you have shown great control and restraint in keeping that reknowned Basque temper in check and behaving with great aplomb and good taste. For this alone, you deserve our praise. You handled the insults and spiteful words magnificently. I must say I really envy you. Had I been in your shoes I don't know if I would have been able to behave as a gentleman like you did. It was a great exercise in self control. Obviously your nobility has shown throughout this ordeal
Fanto,
A quote from Libertad para Cuba blog:
"Now, I’ll say quickly that I actually like reading Mr Manuel Blog but I just can't stomach too much fireworks with demented bloggers...Withholding names, I hate giving deranged people any spotlight".
Gee, I wonder whom they were refering to in that last sentence?
I give you 3 hints and they all start with an F.
LMAO Agustin, I wonder who that deranged person is..I haven't a clue...lol
just look at the name of blog
Review of Cuban american Blogs...
who the fuc. in his right mind will open such a blog to divide us more..
Who is this person who thinks that he can review the work of others
Who said thar cuban bloggers need to be reviewed..and for what reason
dont you think those are demented thoughs
drink more kool aid
LOL
CSL
"Just look at the name of blog: Review of Cuban-American Blogs.
Who the fuc. in his right mind will open such a blog to divide us more? Who is this person who thinks that he can review the work of others? Who said that Cuban bloggers need to be reviewed and for what reason? Don't you think those are demented thoughts? Drink more kool aid. LOL. CSL. — fantomas
fantomas:
Of all the ideas I have had in my life, I consider the Review of Cuban-American Blogs to have been one of the happiest. The name is imposing and authoritative; it literally says it all. If anyone were better suited than me to undertake this thankless task, then surely it would have been done long before I undertook to do it.
The truth can never foster division. The real threat comes from a false unity founded on lies.
Professor and the gang of the Kool Aid kids,
here is a good example of Fantomas "fighting" on other Blogs for Cuba's freedom. Interesting commentary from our freedom fighter. The commentary says it all. Enjoy.
Fantomas dijo...
Ernesto me gustaria agrandarme la cabilla en Cuba
No sabes cuanto cobran por el aumento?
6:41 PM
This from the same guy who criticizes us for our comments on the Blog. His comments concern his fear that his organ is not big enough. This has got to be the funniest comment anywhere in the Blogsphere.
To all,
That comment was posted on the Penultimos Dias Blog today under the posting that references an article about a web site called Havana Hospital.
And still he sits there wondering why he is not taken seriosusly by us.
To all,
this is the same commentary on another blog, this one is Phil Peters the Cuban Triangle, from our favorite "freedom fighter".
Fantomas dijo...
Peters how much do they charge for penis enlargement?
I want my cabilla bigger
July 19, 2007 1:00 PM
Another example of his patriotic efforts to bring freedom to Cuba mixed in with his concern for his penis size. I call this one "penis obsession".
Agustín:
Since his late operation failed to unconceal his concealed member, fantomas has had to make do with an artificial vagina (made by the same South Korean firm that manufactured Castro's artificial anus). Can you really blame fantomas for wishing to reconstruct his stunted member? I do not think so. However, he can be faulted for wanting to do in Communist Cuba what he could more easily do here. Why does he literally want to give Castro his "penis money?" Is it because he thinks he can convinced the Cuban doctors to graft his head there, too? We at The Madhouse certainly would never have consented to such an abomination.
This has got to be the funniest comment anywhere in the Blogsphere.
and Thats exactly what it is SUPPOSED TO BE A FUNNY BONE COMMENT ...
Con esa misma cabilla Agustin agrandada en el cuban Hospital te voy a sonar, y cuidado no te agaches como fifo que yo no soy felipito
LOL
fasntomas:
This thread still remains pretty much intelligible. If I complied with your request and opened the floodgates to the Anonimi they would asassinate all sense here and degrade what has thus far been a successful exercise in collaborative humor.
Tellechea thanks for leaving this message on my blog...I never had the opportunity to thank you personally . I can see that you have always been and abajofidelblog avid reader and client ..thanks again
Manuel A.Tellechea said...
Fidel Castro has actually boasted that Cuba's prostitutes are the cleanest and best educated in the world and that they sell themselves because they like sex not because of economic necessity, as other prostitutes do.
This is at once both an advertisement for prostitution in Cuba and the worst indictment of it that anyone could inadvertently make. It is bad enough to have to admit that Cuban women (even prepubescents) sell their bodies in order to feed their children, parents and siblings; but to suggest, as Castro does, that they do so because they enjoy consorting with old, fat perverted men who haven't had sex in decades, because no one in their own countries, not even the local prostitutes, would consider bedding them, is the worst insult that this greatest of all degenerates could aim at his mother, sisters, daughters and all Cuban women.
Far more tragic, I think, is the emasculation of Cuban men who allow their womenfolk to thus degrade themselves because it is foreigners who enjoy all rights in Cuba, not Cubans.
Those who believe when Cuba is free this situation will continue unchecked are in for a rude awakening. In the future if an old Spaniard or Italian so much as looks askance at a Cuban girl he will be have cause to regret that he ever set foot in Cuba. If the Cuban woman herself doesn't cut him to pieces, then surely every Cuban man within sight will.
9:09 AM
written on the post about prostitution in cuba( video de los españoles)
fantomas:
I have no interest in establishing world blogging records. This is something that would appeal more to your friends at Babalú.
I have always made it a point to leave at least one comment on every anti-Castro Cuban-American blog. Yours, apparently, merited only one. It was probably the first comment you had received in a long time or would receive for a long time in the future. Cherish it. It may one day be what you are remembered for.
The Conclusion
When we last left our anti-hero fantomas, he was being carted off in a caja China by the Babalunians, who were headed for the border, nowise impeded in their progress. At some point, however, the royal varlet Moneo dropped the box, which caused it to split in two. Out hopped fantomas and sought refuge in a nearby pit which turned out to be a bear pit. Whereupon the entire delegation, led by Emperor Valentín I and Henry, Prince of Fails, took flight; but not before they had bludgeoned the varlet Moneo, who, though bloodied and pretty much bowed, managed to follow them.
Meanwhile from the pit screams could be heard that were not exactly of panic. In fact, they sounded more like screams of passion:
"¡O Cheche, O Cheche!"
The End.
This comment which fantomas made on another thread has been removed to The Madhouse because it was determined to be obscene and libellous:
Tellechea is it true what sources are telling me you are related to this guy?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4S1mzIdi-Y
7/20/2007 5:52 PM
More idiocies from fantomas which have been moved to The Madhouse where they belong:
Chechechea:
Let's see how smart you are, review this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fnsE_Kma5j4
7/21/2007 12:37 AM
"Your comment was removed to The Madhouse, where it belongs. Do it again and you will be removed to The Madhouse again yourself. — Tellechea
Don't you ever threatened a Fantomas ever again? Te puede salir caro.
7/21/2007 12:39 AM
SPECIAL BULLETIN
After 2 nights of wild bear love which he will never forget, fantomas has returned voluntarily to the RCAB Madhouse, where he was re-admitted in the middle of the night pending final approval from Vana and Agustín.
The reunion between fantomas and Mr. Chechechea was such as might be expected.
Mr. fantomas was last heard screaming to Mr. Chechechea:
You're a bear; you're a bear!"
The Madhouse is where Ms fanta still belongs, now he's obsessed with bears...lol...we should have never released him/her
Vana:
Don't worry; we shall never make that mistake again. The Madhouse is now fantomas' permanent domicile. He will live and he will die there, with his cheche, his bears and the whole menagerie.
If he tries to escape or the Babalunians try to break him out again, there will be a shoot to kill order in place. He is probably rabid already from feral episodes in the wild and cannot be allowed out among the general population.
The lobotomy has already been scheduled for Monday. Meanwhile he is receiving 8 daily enemas and we haven't even made a dent in the viscosity of his colon. That may have to go, too, which is just as well because he can't sit up in a toilet and could well drown if he dropped through.
We have taken on quite a responsibility, Dame Vana. I trust we will be up to it.
Manuel and Vana,
his lunatic ravings tell me it is not safe any longer for him to be allowed outside. I vote with Manuel for a lobotomy as soon possible, preferably this coming Monday;in the meantine some electroshocks I think will do him some good, I hope. Here I thought he had made some progress, but obviously I was deceived and fooled by his pretended apparent good behaviour. How cunning can these inmates be. Evidently this calls for some very strong medicine and a lobotomy is the only thing left. Poor soul, mental disease can be so ravaging on a person. But I think this coming operation is for his own good. There is no longer any hope for him. It pains me to have to do this, but I find it absolutely necessary for his well being.
Agustín:
Unfortunately, they are not making electric shock convulsive equipment any more in the U.S., so while we are waiting for a machine to be shipped to us from Romania, we have improvised by running a live electrical wire from a light fixture to a garland of copper wire wrapped around fantomas' head. We have covered the wire in turn with a soaked towel. The pyrotechnic effects are wonderful and the steam thus generated heats the entire Madhouse. Of course, we must be very careful not to cross the fine line between electric convulsive treatment and electrocution. Although both, really, would provide a solution to fantomas' problem, and in case of an electrical surge the result would be an act of Nature, much as if a thunderbolt had struck him. We proceed with care but mindful that whatever the outcome fantomas will be the better for it.
Manuel:
I believe your sending her to the Madhouse did the trick, Ms Fanta has left on around the world tour, seeking healthier climates for her dementia
Vana:
I still think there is going to be a Madhouse 2: The Return of Fantomas.
Like all prima donnas, (s)he will retire a dozen times before (s)he actually dies on stage. The nature of the beast.
Manuel,
I hope you are wrong and we have seen the last of it. I can only take so much of lunatic ravings and his behaviour was getting tiresome and boring. It was always on or off with our distinguish friend, and one never knew when he was going to flare up again and start blabbering inanities to add to his comentaries. Just for the hell of it, we should all visit his Blog and give him a good dosage of his own medicine. But that would be giving his more importance than he deserves. Perhaps now you can start posting the excellent articles on Cuban politics and history you did before and we can get back to our regular program. I had enough silly interruptions for 2 weeks.
Agustín:
As I said, I don't think it's going to be that easy. Think about it. Fantomas, a man of his word? It seems to me highly likely that he will return in one of his other disguises for now before erupting on us as fantomas again.
In any case, perhaps you are right that we should keep a positive outlook.
What do you think of renaming The Madhouse in honor of our departed friend: The Fantomas Memorial Madhouse for the Stupid and Obnoxious?
LMAO...Manuel, I like the name, like you I believe he will return to blow our minds, I for one don't think he's a man of his word, we shall have to wair and see
Vana:
Fantomas has managed 24 hours without befouling himself here. They always say the first 24 hours are the hardest.
Manuel,
I agree wholeheartly with the idea of renaming the Madhouse. I hope we have seen the last of Fantomas, although one never knows with the mentally defective. He may reappear at anytime and spoil our day again.
Manuel:
I went to Abajo Fidel, honestly I seldom go, but the funny thing is, that most commenters only go there to insult miss Fanta, he has created enemies all along the blogsphere, that's what he gets, seems most hate him
Vana:
Val & Company unleashed fantomas on RCAB, first and foremost, to be rid of him themselves; and secondly, to disrupt the proceedings here. They succeeded in neither objective.
Manuel:
I knew in my heart that fanta was sent here, I suspected it almost from the start, of course he succeeded in doing nothing, except to become a pest
Answer to Libertadparacuba:
Libertad:
I know you've been waiting for my answer a long time, and here it is: You really must get a sense of humor. If necessary, borrow one from a friend.
Tyrants are usually humorless and understandibly so: they know they are the butt of everybody's jokes.
We, who are free, can afford the luxury of laughing at others or even at ourselves. It is part of the fullness of life which we enjoy here. To renounce it would be to surrender a part of our freedom.
But if, however, you lost your funny bone in the war, then feel free to read "The Madhouse" as an allegory, which is certainly possible. Then the humor will turn to sadness and you will be suitably depressed.
By the way, comment moderation (that is, preemptive censorship) will kill your blog (or any other blog). If you want it to grow and prosper, kill it. This is a far more ominous development in every respect than The Madhouse.
What do you need it for, anyway? To prevent fantomas from commenting on your blog? That certainly would be giving too much "credibility to a deranged asshole," as you put it. Censorship (preemptive or otherwise) should not be practiced against anyone, even the deranged. It is a tool born of fear which betrays fear. Useful to tyrants, perhaps, but of no use whatever to free men.
Reply from LibertadparaCuba from Cuba: Island Paradise/Island Prison:
Manuel:
Don't flatter yourself is not good PR. and yes... I do have a pretty good sense of humor,I just don't have time for Bullshit and Kids play. Enrique is a waste of air and time. This is my blog and I'll control people's comment not for fear but to respect to others, This blog is not going to be use for a comedy central platform. Try not to be so numpy, will ya? Take time to smell the flowers but try not to inhale a bee. By the way, try taking your intellect and vanity of mind over to cuba and see how far it gets you. My name is not enrique... remember that I don't worship anyone... Sorry, if i'm not fascinated by your dazzling intellect manuel. Your tongue is quick and clever. Be careful you do not trip over it. You and Georgie Porgie seem to be an a Intellect competition. Who's the biggest Dork intellectual wise?? Stay tuned Folks...I really, don't care... Sharing with others is knowledge and learning from others is wisdom.
July 23, 2007 10:04 AM
Libertad:
I am amazed by you. Two different people seem to have written this post and your reply. The first was barely intelligible in English; the latter had a good command of it. Any explanation? Or do you just have good days and bad?
I don't have to "flatter myself;" others are always doing that for me.
Your statement "this is my blog and I'll control people's comments" sounds a lot like fantomas. Or Castro. Or Goebbels.
And what the hell is "numpy?"
You say that you are not "fascinated" by my intellect. I never asked you to be. Although, you do hold the all-time record as the most frequent visitor to my blog. Surely that bespeaks some fascination at least and a lot of good taste.
Your comparison of me to George Moneo was certainly hitting below the belt. I'll try to ignore it.
Manuel:
I went to libertadparacuba's site tried to appeal to his good sense, I know is none of my affair, but I feel I must intercede, I cannot believe he got so upset about the little fun we had at the Madhouse, after all it was not done in his blog, let's see if he publishes my comment
Vana's wise advice:
Libertadparacuba:
I'm surprised at you getting so upset about a little fun we were having at the Madhouse, we did not do this in your blog, we don't need anymore division among Cuban bloggers, this is nuts, now you and Manuel are upset at each other, sorry but you should have stayed out of it, I enjoy your blog too, but this is ridiculous, please work this out with Manuel before too many ugly words are said and you two get to the point of no return, this saddens me, I thought we were all friends
July 23, 2007 3:18 PM
LibertadparaCuba answers to Vana:
Vana:
I'm not upset trust me... Only exercising my freedom of speech that's all. Voicing my opinion. I don't play those games, getting upset and deleting blog links... I'm an adult not a kid. We are friends. Just expressing my point of view that's all Vana.
July 23, 2007 5:57 PM
LibertadparaCuba does not take Vana's good advice:
Manuel:
I never called myself brainy intellect like you. It seems to me like you like to call people names from what I can see from your comments. I wonder about you sometimes, do you copy and paste all your articles, no brain work there.
July 23, 2007 6:05 PM
Libertad:
I do not know if you are fantomas, but you certainly sound and act like fantomas. Supposedly, you are somebody name "Sole" from Chester, N.Y. But I am not so sure anymore.
I cut and paste other people's idiotic remarks so that I can analyze and dissect them. Except for your ramblings on this thread, I have thus far seen nothing objectionable about your blog.
However, if you were some day to start spouting party-line propaganda I would most assuredly strike you from my "Fraternal Blogroll" without a moment's regret.
To be linked to my blog means that one shares with me an ideological and intellectual affinity. In your case, just ideological.
Your embrace of preeemptive censorship ("moderation") I find intolerable and unacceptable. Therefore, I will no longer be commenting on your blog.
Just as I feared, we are at the point of no return
Comment from Rick of "Stuck on the Palmetto" who taught fantomas everything he knows:
Just to be clear, Manuel, are you representing here that you and Val are of two different generations? A generation is what...20 years, Manuel?
Have you decided to continue the lie that you are in your 80's or 90's?
Do you really want to do that right here?
7/25/2007 9:14 AM
Rick:
Your comment has been removed to The Madhouse, where it properly belongs. You are no doubt acquainted with it since you are a regular reader of this blog.
I will no longer humor your obsession with my age, which I have addressed here on a dozen occasions.
Because I actually use my name and do not conceal it as you and your partner Alex do at Stuck on the Palmetto, people know more about me than they could possibly know about you.
The day you reveal your name publicly, I will reveal my exact age to you.
How about it?
Manuel A.Chechechea said...
"Tellechea, whenever you feel the urge to masturbate on some baseless fantasy again, lock yourself in your bathroom. Don't do it on my blog." --Andy
Isn't he rude? He obviously does not know that we masturbate in the park, right here in Union City, New Jersey, as we fantasize about Babalu.
7/30/2007 11:54 AM
Manuel A.Chechechea said...
"I am a systematic critic of Babalú: ten dozen longgggg posts devoted to exposing their infatuation with Newt Gingrich and Fred Thompson; their ridiculous campaigns against Spain and Sting and The Police; their vassalage to Bush and refusal to criticize Cuban-American politicians; their reflexive pro-Americanism and flag-waving; their efforts to silence or intimidate all other voices in the Cuban-American blogosphere; in sum, their infantilism and arrogance, which pervades everything they do."
I sure told them, didn't I?
7/30/2007 12:14 PM
Manuel A.Chechechea said...
Dear, please increase the dosage on my Thorazine drip. The delusions are getting worse...
manuel a. chechechea said ...
Ahora me confirmaste que te estás cagado del miedo, maricón. ¿No quieres otras opiniones? ¿No quieres tener un diálogo?
7/30/2007 1:09 PM
manuel a. chechechea said...
"It showed a trace of imagination, no doubt sparked by following in my tracks."
Another masturbatory fantasy, Evil Manuel?
7/30/2007 2:29 PM
fantomas said ...
DESCUBIERTO EL MISTERIO
VIDEO DE MANUEL TELLECHEA ( NO TENIA 90 AÑOS NA)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqFuhf6-nvo&mode=related&search=
fantomas said...
Breaking news chechechea on video
video of manolito chec che chia
bringing in flowers to his girlfriend
lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQkjurUK5lE
8/04/2007 1:10 AM
Fantomas said...
quote:
"Somebody has to refute them. Barbs are not going to do it. Besides, their shit fertilizes my roses."
Anyone, who said that?
8/04/2007 1:25 AM
fantomas said ...
por que lo quitas ..anda dejalo o te lo pongo en mi blog y es peor
cant take the heat manny boy
8/04/2007 9:27 AM
fantomas said ...
Tellechea how many times have you been arrested por leerle los versos sencillos de marti a 12 year old boys...C mon come clean che che
8/07/2007 11:53 PM
fantomas said ...
Nutty man, de que te quejas?
tu has borrado varios mios...
ayer te pregunte que cuantas veces a ti te habian arrestado por leerle los versos sencillos de Marti a 12 year old boys
fue solo una pregunta...You can say how many or none...
Why delete the message?
8/08/2007 3:55 PM
fantomas said ...
oye manolito sigues censurandome, por que te ofendes , explicale eso a tus lectores
entonces porque fustigas a corralito si tu haces lo mismo
NAMBLA IS CALLING UPON YOU
fantomas 8-8-07
8/08/2007 5:09 PM
Post a Comment