BUCL's Last Hurrah

Well, it is over. Or at least that's what BUCL's unelected leader declared in the latest edition of The Babalu (Faux) Radio Hour. The 2nd Campaign has followed the first into the dustbin of history, another exercise in empty if earnest bravado which, in the end, signified nothing. After the monumental failure of its first campaign, BUCL became somewhat less ambitious. The Campaign Against Spain sought to bring a nation to its knees; the 2nd Campaign limited its scope to three or four addlebrained Britons. Well, they didn't BUCL either but remained true to their lifelong Marxist convictions. It was not enough for Henry that these men were hypocrites, long past their prime and virtually unknown among our countrymen; the kind of spokesmen that should be shunned rather than courted. Henry had this infantile obsession with bringing his childhood idols to the cause, much as if Jose Marti had misdirected his efforts towards getting "La Belle Otero" (the Spanish dancer of Verse IX of the Versos sencillos) to make a declaration in favor of Cuban independence.

Sting and The Police in the person of Andy Summers would not budge even when confronted by Henry and his incendiary device (the vigil candle which he admits he was holding when he approached the dimunitive Summers in the restaurant foyer). Fate gave him the opportunity to make his pitch to one of the band members in person; proobably the 63rd or 84th pitch which guitarist Andy Summers heard that day and distinct from the others only because it was not a business proposition. But no luck. Even if Henry had been 1000 times more persuasive, he could not have moved them. Unless you are carrying a suitcase of cash it is unlikely that these "humanitarians" could be moved to assist a blindman across the street, or even to tell their chauffeur to swerve in order to miss him.

Having failed to move their hearts, Henry next attempted to shame them into doing the right thing. Sting and The Police being as shameless as they are, this was quite a tall order. But the banner was painted and the airplane leased, so what the heck. He rubbed the BUCL banner in their faces in the middle of their Miami concert, unaware, perhaps, that these drugged-out sexagenerians were lucky not to fall off the stage and could certainly not be expected to read a banner at 200 feet let alone 2000; for them, the banner, if they saw it at all, was a weird-looking cloud, recumbant eye-chart or a tickertape in the sky with diamonds. It would actually be worse if Sting and The Police had actually managed to read it, for then their non-reaction was an intentional rebuff of the BUCLers and the Cuban cause, purchased and paid for by the BUCLers themselves. At least Henry didn't waste his time or BUCL's money printing up flyers for the concert-goers, who were probably in as "confused" a state as Sting and Police, having just paid $250 to discover that you can't go home again, that youth and their youthful illusions are dead.

It was pointed out to us that on the Pérez Roura Show over Radio Mambí Henry had agreed to a boycott of Sting and The Police if they failed to live up to their good opinion of them. It is well that he has left bad enough alone. To continue this charade would have bordered on the masochistic.

Henry says that he will take 2 weeks off before the start of the Third Campaign. He should take 2 months off or better yet 2 years. Perhaps by then the next campaign may not be necessary or he will finally have grown up. In this time of reflection, however, Henry should consider a campaign to democratize BUCL. Martí founded his own "BUCL" 116 years ago (the PRC) which differed from Henry's organization only in that it was successful. But Marti did not ordain himself leader by divine right but was elected and re-elected by by its members. Now I have no doubt that the 6 or so members of BUCL would elect Henry Gomez Grand Puma or anything else he wanted (hopefully not Delegate). Even if it's only pro forma Henry should submit his leadership to the will of its members (if we may still use the plural in relation to its membership). Having established his democratic bona fides Henry can then preach democracy to the Cuban people. The last thing that the Cuban people need is another caudillo (though, thankfully, Henry would make the most risible caudillo in history).

So, Henry, my advice to you is to get on your white horse — which hopefully won't BUCL — and ride off into the sunset or twilight or whatever you think best becomes you.


POSTSCRIPT:

Do your funny bone a favor and listen to this week's canned Babalú [Faux] Radio Hour. It was the funniest one to date with the BUCLERS trying to credit Henry with BUCL's "success," and Henry, angrily, trying his best to evade their praise.